Farewell Ben Boy

A friend of mine has recently said farewell to her beloved black Labrador Ben Boy.  It’s particularly hard since she’s only just said farewell to her dear old Dad.  How tough is that? 

It’s set me to thinking about our dogs, particularly our old dogs.  How we love do them, and how hard it is to say farewell.  Perhaps it’s particularly hard since often we have to choose to call the vet and ask to have them put to sleep.   We have to consciously make that decision ourselves, which is not something we have to do with humans. 

Making that call is awful, it can feel so raw.  Before making that call you have probably been nursing them along for ages, perhaps years, watching the decline and trying to look after them as best you can.  Sometimes you are not even aware of the decline, because you are so familiar with it.  Your beloved dog is just getting older, it’s nobody’s fault, it’s just life.

Now you have to play god.  It seldom feels the right time and seldom do we have enough headspace to deal with it properly. 

I do believe that animals can have a good death.  I once had an elderly tabby cat named Hannah who showed me that the end can be okay, even dignified and beautiful.  She took herself off to her favourite spot under the Wisteria in the back garden and stopped eating and drinking, it was so clear.  It was an experience I am forever grateful for. 

Making decisions like that takes emotional awareness and courage.  It saddens me when people say that they couldn’t go through it again, and chose not to have another animal. 

I think that one of the greatest gifts of having an animal is that they give us the opportunity to love.   Which means that when it’s time for them to go it’s heart breaking.

RIP Ben Boy – much loved.